How do I 'get over myself?'?

As for money, since you are an interesting person and love to write, what of Google Hub Pages. I would recommend this highly. For the motivated person, it is a way to make a decent income. In the interim, keep applying; right now it's an impossible market. When I retired from academia, I thought the economic downturn would be relatively short-lived. Well, I was VERY wrong. I worked for months to broker a deal with Scholastic as a writer of reference books. And now that is my life! If I'm not writing, I'm reading and researching. I'm solvent, but not living in the lap of luxury. I can commiserate. All I can say to you is persist!!! Think outside the box, not about your shortcomings but about your strengths and what you have to offer. It's brutal, but that's life.